Getting a New Perspective

Getting unstuck is a process of giving up former views and attitudes. Getting a new perspective can help you get past your walls and move you toward healthier relationships, a life of contentment, a brighter future, and to begin living out the purpose God created you to accomplish.

Humility: The first step to getting a new perspective comes with humility. Humility allows us to see that we are all strugglers: “For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard” (Romans 3:23). When we admit this fact, we take away our entitlement to blame and shame. We take the focus off the sin done to us and put more emphasis on the reality that we are human and therefore inclined to make mistakes. We must see ourselves as we really are; needy, broken, and in need of a savior.

The Holy Spirit: We do not have to live as a slave to our emotions and instincts, because God has given us a power that can control these troublesome impulses. If we want to move past walls, we must come to the place where we treat people better than they treat us. The power of the Holy Spirit that lives in us enables us to do that: “But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you” (Acts 1:8). When humility and living in the power of God is added, walls come down: “Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me” (2Corinthians 12:9). Instead of focusing on the past and the bad that has happened, begin to see the people who hurt you as having the same needs and begin to pray for them. Remind yourself that you have greatness within you and that you can conquer anything: “I can do everything through Him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13).

Sharing the bond of imperfection: The next step toward widening your view of reality is an acknowledgment that the person who hurt you was raised in a broken world and most likely damaged in some way, which led them to become an abuser. It is simply being aware of the reality that all life on earth is imperfect. We share a bond of imperfection that comes out of God’s gift of free choice. The gift of choice frees you to make up your own mind and to choose your own priorities, but just as we make poor choices causing others to suffer, we also have felt the effects from the poor choices of others. If you can see your hurt in a context that we live in a broken world with broken people, it may lead you to a position where you gain a new perspective of your abuser and the event that has blocked your life.

Forgiving mind-set: The fourth step toward gaining a truer perspective is a mind-set that provides you with a new way of looking at the past and those who hurt you. In addition, it will allow you to connect with those in the present who continue to inflict pain and stir up trouble in your life. Not to be confused with the act of forgiveness, the spirit of forgiveness is a way of approaching all of life. You know that on any given day, you will have to forgive many slights, insults, and unintentional hurts. It becomes a daily habit of looking beyond the personal mistakes of others and making an effort to see good things that happen to you as God’s favor. In gratitude for God’s goodness, you gladly extend grace to others, including those who have hurt you. Are you ready to let go of resentment and begin to live your life in healthy freedom from the past?