Self-Inflicted Anger

Many people will say the reasons behind their anger come from external pressures including spouse, children, parents, job, or other person or situation. Different environments do present difficulties, and sometimes does increase stress, but you still have a free will to manage your adult life and to take personal responsibility for your choices and how those choices ultimately affect you. The following are some of the more common patterns of self-inflicted anger.

Moral decline: Anger is linked to the preservation of personal worth, needs, and convictions. People are looking for affirmation and when found, anger is reduced. But too many people increase their anger by compromising their morals to gain acceptance. In the short term, some satisfaction is felt. But over the long term immorality and emotional turmoil go hand in hand. Moral purity is more than a code of acceptable and unacceptable behavior. Morality is a reflection of our respect for others. It illustrates our belief in the dignity of human beings. Immorality gives people a sense of meaninglessness. An immoral lifestyle is one of dissatisfaction and emptiness and that leads to increased frustration and anger.

Work becomes all-encompassing: Work is necessary for personal well-being. Yet as important and fruitful as work can be, it is not life’s ultimate aim. When people are consumed by work and busyness they typically describe themselves as stressed. Overworked, stressful people are angry. Personal needs are left wanting. To remedy the frustrations created by excessive work, don’t go to the other extreme of excessive play. Balance can be found. Primarily this will happen as relationships are nurtured and limits are enforced regarding activities.

Poor health habits develop: There are many unhealthy ways relating to self-inflicted anger. They include overeating, smoking, lack of exercise, not enough sleep, poor hygiene, and substance abuse. Each of these habits contributes to irritability, low self-esteem, added stress, and reduces quality of life. How you care for yourself is your choice. However, anger can be resolved by examining how you contribute to your own unwanted circumstances. People seeking to manage anger properly will logically and correctly conclude that physical health is a powerful element of personal stability.

Material gain is overemphasized: There is nothing wrong with enjoying many of life’s pleasures. Problems arise when material gain is required for happiness. Perhaps the most common form of anger associated with material emphasis is envy, frustration over someone else’s possession of something we want. If we run the race of materialism, we become vulnerable to false superiority. Anger is reduced when we feel loved, respected and understood. These things cannot be bought. 

Spiritual life is ignored: Anger management is ultimately linked to spiritual stability. When spiritual vitality is absent, personal stability is no longer a matter of inner strength.  Daily problems become overwhelming when we do not have a on-going relationship with God. Being a peace with God empowers us to confidently combat worldly imperfections that would otherwise increase irritability and anger.