Pain helps us Grow

“No pain, no gain.” When we exercise, we have to push through. The runner feels as if he or she cannot take another step, but keeps going to reach another level. The weight lifter does not think he can take another repetition, but continues to press to get to another level. The same thing is true in character growth: we stretch to grow. We push through the vulnerability, fear, and the pain. We embrace suffering to reach a higher level. Maturity and completion is our goals. Pain is good when it leads somewhere. Pain can bring health. Pain is good when we learn from it and it results in growth & maturity.

Bad pain comes from repeating old patterns and avoiding the suffering it would take to change. Many times people suffer because of their own character faults. Other people offer comfort and a spiritual pep talk how God is with them in this time of testing. They frame the experience as the testing of an innocent person: “Keep the faith and God will reward you for persevering”, they say. The problem is that these people don’t tell those suffering that their suffering is the fruit of their own character and it is of no value unless they see it as a wake-up call. Bad pain is wasted pain. It is the pain we go through to avoid the good pain of growth that comes from pushing through.    

Suffering is the path Jesus modeled for us, and He modeled how to do it right. He went through it all without sin and with obedience. This is the difference between those who suffer to a good end and those who suffer to no good at all. Peter came to see suffering as armor. He came to see suffering as protection against sin.  We can arm ourselves with this same attitude. “Therefore, since Christ suffered in His body, arm yourselves also with the same attitude, because he who has suffered in his body is done with sin. As a result, he does not live the rest of his earthly life for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God” (1Peter 4:1-2). As we learn to embrace suffering as something to learn from, we are able to break away from harmful patterns that ruin our lives.  

The first way to arm ourselves with the attitude of Christ is “empty” ourselves. Jesus emptied Himself by giving up “equality with God” (see Phil. 2:5-8). We cannot be in control of everything, be the boss or the judge, write the rules, or any other aspect of God’s roles. Assuming the humble position of bowing to God instead of trying to be Him starts the process. We first obey the Spirit of Grace by accepting His love and forgiveness. We then continue by humbling ourselves to obey the rest of His desires and will for us.

The second way to arm ourselves with the attitude of Christ is to submit to God’s will. We can identify with Jesus’ suffering by identifying with what Jesus experienced in the Garden of Gethsemane. He prayed to be to God to be relieved, yet He said, “Not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:42). Often we choose to do things our way to avoid pain and suffering like sex, substances, performance, and materialism. While these do offer temporary relief, they cannot carry the weight of the problem. To choose to do God’s will, and not our own, is to turn away from those options directly to the problem themselves.

The third way to arm ourselves with the attitude of Christ is to not retaliate. Ultimately, we are only as healthy as our ability to relate as God relates. He is honest, loving, and forgiving. Good relationships equal good health. So if I can be drawn into unhealthy patterns, then I am not healthy. I become dependent and at the mercy of whatever treatment I am receiving at the moment.